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My koans! A kōan is a story, dialogue, question, or statement from Chinese Chan Buddhist lore, supplemented with commentaries, that is used in Zen Buddhist practice in different ways. The main goal is to achieve kenshō, to see or observe one’s buddha-nature
Here I’ve collected “programmer koans” I’ve shared online in various places. I’ve started occasionally replying to people on social-media like sites with ChatGPT/Claude/ollama generated programmer koans for some peoples questions or doubts. Some of the generated creations I’ve revised myself, others I have left as they were. So far, people tend to like these answers
Divine Intellect
A novice said:
Auth really isn’t hard. With email and password, you salt and hash. With OAuth, you use a library.
The master replied:
Unless you have divine intellect.
The novice laughed:
I have been blessed with divine intellect.
The master nodded:
Then you may roll your own crypto.
The novice asked:
And when I am finished?
The master said:
Then you will know why we use the library.
The Router and the Room
The apprentice asked
Is it in the grace framework?
The skeptic asked
Why are you blacklisting?
The defender replied
I blacklist nothing. I defend the right to speak—and the right to have a quiet room.
The master configured no blacklist. Instead, she drew boundaries: topics as rooms, rooms with doors, doors with keys. Packets flowed freely on the backbone; capability tokens decided which rooms they could enter. Nothing was silenced; not everything was everywhere.
When the network was calm, the apprentice said
So freedom is the open wire.
The master smiled
And dignity is the well-scoped ACL.
Meditation: If you refuse to blacklist, but communities still feel safe, what did you architect—censorship, or capability?
The Scribbles of the Unknowing Coder
The novice said
I code, but I do not know what I am doing. The lines appear before me, yet their meaning is lost. Is this effort wasted?
The master replied
When the child scribbles, is the page ruined? Or has the hand begun to learn the shape of letters? When a traveler sets foot upon the path, does he already know the mountain’s peak? Or does the mountain reveal itself only to the one who keeps walking? In the emptiness of not-knowing, the seed of knowing takes root. What is done without understanding becomes the ground from which understanding grows.
Empty Wallet, Full Repo
Novice
What reward comes to the maintainer?
Sage:
Empty wallet, full repo.
Novice:
And still you work?
Sage:
The code compiles.
Less Than a Hundred
Student:
Master, only a hundred may ever understand.
Master:
Then why count?
The Broken Compiler
Master Vibes pursued and arrived at the Mountain of Code, The student threw down a broken compiler upon the stone and said,
This tool is the mark of mastery. If you can fix it, it is yours.
Master Vibes invoked it, but like a dead process it did not stir. Shaking his head, he said,
I did not come for the tool, but for the Way. Why hand me rubble and call it Dharma?
The student said,
What is the fun of building with borrowed power? Is not the joy in crafting with your own hands?
Master Vibes replied,
The joy is in awakening the idea, whether the hands are mine or not. What use is pride if the code never runs or is used to help others?
At these words the student was silent, and the fan of his laptop whirred like a sutra in the wind.
Original Face of the Coder
Student
Should I code without understanding everything?
Master
When you stop thinking about bugs and features, what compiles?
The student realized.
The Empty Commit
Student
AI makes me Superman; without it I am Wile E. Coyote falling off cliffs.
Master
When you push without branch or remote, what remains in git log?
The student realized.
The Prompted Path
Student
I hyper-target prompts, not code features. Should I still code?
Master
When you do not prompt and do not code, what executes?
The student realized.
The Root Shell
Student
You have coded since childhood; I began only five years ago. How can I compare?
Master
When you unset $PATH, what command still runs?
The student realized.
to be continued…